Heavy weekend

Oh gosh, this Mistress of Chantals knows how to put people at work! And not even limited to her own slaves!

Let's say I appreciate her motivating me to exceed myself in scripting and create something usefull. I've been busy scripting nearly all weekend!
But I won't be able keep up this pace during the week. There's something like rl work too, also demanding a lot of my mental resources.

And no, it isn't finished yet. I think I can start testing it soon, though. I might need a lab rat for that. Mmmmmm.... Syllie?
It's not going to kill her. At most render her a little bit... restricted.

Where do scripters like Marine get their energy?

Walking the Path..

I feel much better after another good night's sleep. And after a peace giving session with Syllie of course.

Such a wonderful girl she is! And such a twisted mind...
Thank You so much!

As for the situation in our family, I believe things are evolving positively now. Chantals Mistress' mind seems to be as wicked as mine, and the both of us exchanging ideas even has some fun in it nowadays.
I'm looking forward atm to tell her my newest demonic thought, can you imagine?!

Naah.... I'm not gonna tell it here. Maybe I should work it out first, and surprise her with a demo. Ohhh, keeping my mouth shut is difficult, should I gag myself and loose the key? Kidding...

DS

Self analysis

Confused, scared, disoriented,... I don't know how to describe how I feel exactly right now. Maybe my vocabulary is too limited for it.

Time for some self analysis again..

I first experienced this urgent feeling of doubt when I saw Chantal yesterday. Former Mistress Chantal...

She won't agree to this and deny it, my sis Carolin tells me not to worry, she has seen Chantal like that before. I hope Carolin is right. But it was very difficult for me, as for me, it was the first time I saw her that submissive. Was there a bell ringing that famous saturday where she submitted to me, and did I just not hear it?
My sis Queen tells me to let Chantal choose her own Path, and she is right also.

But both my sisters' support and advice doesn't take away this strange feeling.
And now what? Domme Chantal, who, although the black hair her Mistress made her wear doesn't fit her skin tone very well, is a delicious and desirable sub? There is no need for that, as I have 2 uttermost desirable and delicious subs myself. If I Domme Chantal, it would be to fullfill her needs, not mine. And because of the fun of course. But her needs seem to be very fullfilled right now...
Or do I want to turn into submission myself?

Maybe this bizarre feeling of mine is due to the realization that I am really without a Mistress' guidance right now. Yes, I think Pike being away starts to wear off on me, and although there is much to be said about her Domme qualities, she is my Mistress still. While she is gone Chantal was taking over from her, but yeah...

I've been wondering what mechanism is responsible for making either my sub or Domme side stronger. It's not just random, or tidal, like the weather or the sea, I believe.
I suspect resistance to unwanted submission has moved my balance heavily away from the sub side.
Being responsible for a girl like Syllie also feeds my Domme side. Although experiences in the past have shown that this also can make the balance go to the sub side very fast and drastically. I believe this is because seeing a girl so happily restricted in her bounds, awakens the wish to be there myself.

Conclusion?
It seems right now the D and S side in me are fighting each other heavily. None of them is ever going to win though.
It's the eternal doom of being a switch...

DS

A Brave New Era

A battle war has been going on. As with so many battles, prices have been paid. Mainly sleep deprivation in this case. Wounds are being licked now, and will hopefully heal.

However, I think I stated before this blog is not a war zone, so I will only write about the constructive results that came out of it. If I feel the need to write about it.

In short: some things might happen and change in our beloved (not so?) little castle soon. Chantal's new Mistress wants to install, try out and ameliorate a new order of submission there. I will give her my input and feedback, but I'm not sure yet how far I will commit myself to this order, or let my 2 beloved girls merge in. Consider me a counselor. Consider our society being multi-cultural, but with active integration and mutual empathy.
Mmmmm much words to describe something we don't even know ourselves how we will do it exactly. But I'll remember the title counselor. As I love my actual title Princess of Paedra very much and would like to keep it, counselor might be a suggestion for my rank in our order.

So what's the aim? We don't think there's need for yet another sl prison, prison life is also not the RP we think of.
Then another kind of Latex Dolls? No again. Although this might get closer, but without the full latex covering. Hmmmm, I'd be happy to see some latex though.
I believe banes will also be out of order, as banishment is built on a totally different base. The best banishment experience is still at Kelley Technologies, I can warmly recommend it to anyone desiring a real banishment experience.

I think we got ourselves a nice challenge here. You might even wonder what went so wrong in the beginning?
well... fact is that submission isn't something that is to be forced, or imposed. Something went wrong there, causing huge resistance. I think we all learned..
Submission should come from the heart. There's no such thing as my Mistress' (Mistress') Mistress is my Mistress too, if not agreed upon voluntarily. Subs -and switches- are people too, no trash or trade ware.

Mmmm, what if I tried to write down Danii's commandments for humane B**M in a next post? Like Chantal did in her profile?


xXx

Family relationships

Time to make a little inventory and sort out some... things.

As you, my dear reader who never reacts, may have noticed, I've got 2 very cute subbie girls right now, and I've also got 2 adorable Mistresses. Then there's both my Mistress's other girls, and my sis Queen of course.

Quite a big family, don't you think? And a bit complicated also, I hear you mumble.
As for sisters, relationships are rather simple, you love each other, you sometimes fight each other, but you have your lifes and mainly go your own way.
But serving 2 Mistresses, it's not always that easy, and we have had some trouble with that in the past. But it's sorted out, as all three of us know I will listen to Mistress Pike first, before accepting orders from Mistress Chantal. And right now, with Mrs. Pike enjoying (I hope) her rl holiday, it's a good thing to have a "backup". I would be so lost otherwise?!

Owning 2 girls on the other side is new to me. A "slave" owning her own "slaves" sounds "ridiculous" to some people, anyway. Not going to tell this story here, as I am still upset about it, and I don't want to use this blog to fight wars.
But yeah... I have to divide my Domination now, as I don't want to do shortage on any of them. I'm very proud and happy I'm Pikes First Girl, and Chantal's Second Girl (after Pike), but I'm not gonna make Syl or Salsa first or second girl myself. There's simply no way of choosing between them.
They're so equivalent, and yet so different. They're complementary. Just to say the least, sessions with Salsa are short and steaming, as we both want to get the most out of her short online times, while Syllie has waaaay too much time. Kidding!

Apart from this all, I've got a strange feeling. I've spent so much time Domming lately, I've lost my sub needs a little bit. It's a part of me I don't want to let go though. I cannot force it - or have it forced - to come back, I will turn to Mistress and beg for her gentle guidance.

xXx

Syllie collared

As you can see, Syllie is wearing my collar now. The collaring was very emotional and personal, so I keep it like that :-)

But what I can tell is, it was the end of a very long session where Syllie had almost no freedom, and was totally controlled by me. We're both taking some time off now to relax. I think Syl needs it, and I need it too, for sure...


xXx

Yesss!

I spent some time with my Salsa!

It was rather technical though, as we were to update her shackles, but I think we managed to combine it all with some fun. And... my power over her will be even stronger next time. I know she likes that. I like it too. I mean, it's not so much the power I like, but imaging how it must feel to be completely helpless and dependent in the hands of someone else, makes me... yeah!
Maybe even more than when I am rendered helpless like that myself. Although I need to experience the sub side myself even so much.

Perhaps if I can convince Chantal to submit using the RLV once, and let her feel its real power, she will know how to use the power herself, when I put it in her hands. Although she successfully proves you can have a great sub time without using the RLV also, I prefer the stricter enforcement of the RLV myself. And I believe getting the best out of it requires the Domme knowing its power.

A problem with a lot of toys is, as Chantal writes it in her profile, that you need to have a Masters degree (it's because of that it's called Masters?) to find your way in all the menu's and commands of all those different products. I so agree with that, even though I have less problems with that myself (I have a Mistress degree, lol) But it quickly becomes a mess when you combine advanced toys from different makers, as in my experience they tend to interfere with each other, so you are never sure anymore about what RLV features are active. And that could disturb the fun.

Oh, with all this technochatter I forgot to mention Salsa looks gorgeous in her new latex suit, and chastity belt. Maybe it needs to be finished up with some kind of ... mmmm, I'm not gonna tell yet -grin-

but please feel free to post your guesses and sugegstions!

(too?) Busy times

Sometimes everything wants to happen at the same moment. Or everyone needs your attention at the same time, and you don't know what to do (first), and you feel sorry anyway, because you weren't able to do it all.

It's what's been happening to me recently.

Last thursday, it was the last time Mistress Pike was in sl before a rl holiday of three weeks. So of course she wanted me with her. So far so good, but fate wanted my beloved Salsa, after a long holiday (?) came online again.
Every other time, I would have turned to her and at least taken her with me. But it was only fair I had to keep my time with Salsa short and rather cool (anything less than steaming is considered cool with Salsa and me together)
I felt a little sad.

Then saturday, I have had some good and special times with Mistress Chantal. I sincerely hope she will pick up her blog again and write about it, for here I will simply say we were rather busy when... my Salsa logged again. As this session with Chantal was very much what I needed atm, I could not abort it.
I felt very sad and sorry again.

So Salsa, I hope we meet better luck next time, I owe you my dear!!
And I promise, I won't let anyone chain me before I had some good time with you!
But I hope I don't have to wait too long

Oh, and in between, Syllie came back on too, I have to take care of her also...

.

Roaming around

SL can be totally different during the weekend than it is during the week. Or it is to me.
Some people are only online during the weekend, others only during the week. Or they are online during different hours. The weekend is the perfect moment to meet and greet residents from all over the RL world, separated by timezones otherwise.

To me, weekend is the moment I often have no choice but to roam and look for diversion without the guidance of my Mistresses, as for different reasons (which are none of your business, nor mine) they are unavailable to me.

I do miss them, of course. But roaming around and seeing other places, people and friends, can also be very rewarding. I wrote last week about my six hours deaf/mute experience, didn't I?

This weekend I was free from restrictions, except from the chastity belt, and I decided to dress casual - i.e. no latex or other kinky stuff - and go hang out at Zhora for a while. A good place to meet interesting people and spot sl celebrities - and banes - hehe.

And yes, I spotted some banes, and met some interesting people, even did some spontaneous rp. It was fun, it was rewarding.
Well... spotting banes isn't, unless you have a sadistic mind and lack all empathic capacities. You have to leave them alone, ignore them, avoid them. It's the only way you can help them anyway.
But a gagged girl in a straight jacket in front of an asylum?? Definitely no bane, so there's nothing wrong with talking to her, isn't it? Especially when the asylum is the same one I kinda got a job offer from, and is the same one where Mistress plans to have me taken in. When it opens of course, which it still hasn't..

Some other people joined in, among them a colleague operator from the KTech Banishment Program, and we had a jolly good chat together. The strange thing was that I ended in my latex catsuit again, even where I started out conventionally dressed! The asylum's shrink took note and mumbled something about addiction or SDS...

Is it time to get my straight jacket washed and ironed up?