Sad.Sad Pike

Tuesday night I had been Domming all evening at Pandora's Box, the new (?) prison I joined as a Mistress. My session was not very exciting, but it was a long time ago I had been a Mistress.

When I came home to Mistress Pike, I still didn't feel subby. So I have been a little bit bad to her - I am sure deep inside she liked it though - so I deserved some punishment. Mistress cuffed me, gagged me and chained me to the bed for the night.

So when I logged wednesday, I was still in chains. Only, sis and Mistress Chantal were home and freed me... to play with me.

When Mistress Pike came on, she was a little sad to see I was no longer chained as when she left me, and very disappointed to learn Mistress Chantal had already left for rl. Mistress Pike has been longing for Mistress Chantal very much, her sub side is very starving I think...

While I had logged in knowing I was in chains for her, I felt rather subby, I was expecting her to punish me, play with me, taking me. Nothing. Mistress was sad - fed up - and even the complete submission of her girl could not comfort her.

At the end we agreed she would turn my doll clockwork on and send me into the world, restricted to the goodwill of others to wind me. That alone is exciting: when the clockwork runs out, I cannot move or talk anymore, and totally depend on someone else to bring me to live again. If nobody's around, I'm stuck...

While out there, I found some new information about bane helmets and suits, made some contacts with people involved, and joined a group to keep in touch and informed. When I returned home to log off, I found Mistress Pike... with a visitor!
I had not been able to reach her via IM, so I was very surprised. I felt very sad I hadn't been the one to comfort her and cheer her up. Pissed, fed up almost.

Why haven't you told me? Am I a too demanding sub? I went to bed very confused, disappointed.

I want to be a bane!
I'm gonna be sooner or later.
..but I'm not sure anymore who can be my custodian/controller :-(
not to speak of Eudeamon...


Please help me!